Friday, November 28, 2008

Who put the freak in freak accident?

Hey, I have an idea.


So this fine morning, the day after Thanksgiving when I should be somewhere worthwhile like the Mall, I find myself getting ready for work and packing my bag for a little road trip at the same time. I start throwing everything into my bag and then decide hey, I might want to paint my nails this weekend, you know, to look like a girl who cares about her nails. I grabbed two bottles of polish and toss them in the bag.

Suddenly fumes start to fill the air and I look down only to realize they have smashed each other at the exact point to break off both the necks of the each bottle leaving the caps on with the polish seeping through onto everything in my overnight bag. I reach my hand into the mess after saying "darn it" (you can choose to believe that or not) and attempt to pick up the bottles only to put a lovely long slice into my unmanicured finger. Picture it: Nail polish dripping everywhere, blood dripping from my finger, and a face that displays 'areyouseriouslycrappingme'.

I am now typing with a band-aid on. Some people are just born "special". This *almost* tops the time I cut my tongue on bacon.


  1. HOW in the world did you cut your tongue on bacon????

  2. Areyouseriouslycrappingme? You cut your tongue on bacon?!!! It must have been some super-crisp bacon. I love bacon...

  3. Nothing could take precedence over backing out of the garage with your rear passenger door open ...
    and we all know what happened then :)

  4. dear anonymous. i'm going to track you down and put you in my trunk with a can of open tunafish.