Friday, February 22, 2008

In Charge of the World

My sweet mama used to read to me as a kid. She started bringing us to the library at a very young age and I have so enjoyed reading. I just love books. A particular childhood favorite was stumbled upon this morning - a poem by Judith Viorst.

If I Were In Charge of the World
If I were in charge of the world
I'd cancel oatmeal,Monday mornings,Allergy shots, and also Sara Steinberg. If I were in charge of the world there'd be brighter nights lights,healthier hamsters, and basketball baskets forty eight inches lower. If I were in charge of the world you wouldn't have lonely.You wouldn't have clean.You wouldn't have bedtimes.Or "Don't punch your sister."You wouldn't even have sisters. If I were ian charge of the world a chocolate sundae with whipped cream and nuts would be a vegetable, all 007 movies would be G, and a person who sometimes forgot to brush, and sometimes forgot to flush,would still be allowed to be... in charge of the world.
by Judith Viorst

And now - my turn!

If Marla Were In Charge of the World

I’d kick Jane Fonda off the island.

Conference talks would be put to rap music so I could stay awake at the gym.

Reruns of Dawson’s creek would be on instead of stupid Sex and the City (let's kick 'sarah jessica i'm so cool i have two first names parker' off the island too).

Jim Henson's birthday would be nationally recognized and we would watch the Muppet movies all day long.

Cupcakes would be a vegetable.

There would be no text messaging – ever.

Instead of stores like Costco, there would be stores for single people who just want one serving of something. And then you’d get an incredible discount for being single.

All movies with Matt Damon would be PG13 and PG.

Mean people would have to pay more taxes.

The work day would be 9 – 2 with a 2 hour lunch.

Tivo would be free of charge to anyone with a TV.

Movies would cost 2.00 – even at nighttime.

Keyboards would be silent so I could get some work done in my cube.

New York and Utah would be on either side of Minnesota.

1 comment:

  1. Conference talks put to rap music. Really? No, come on, you serious with that?